Happiness is finding your serenity

Serenity: a state of grace, of being calm, clear, tranquil and unperturbed.

It’s not a state of being that is easily reached.

Our lives are busy, packed with things and people that demand our attention. And the response demanded of us, is often ‘NOW,’ that is – an instant one.

I believe we are in part responsible for our ‘graceless’ state since we are masters of our own fate and largely responsible for the world we have created and find ourselves now living in.

It’s a 24/7, 365 society in which needs demand to be instantly gratified like some overgrown monster child who cries relentlessly to be fed. With such a state of affairs is it any wonder that many of us are finding ourselves exhausted, out of resource, feeling stressed and depleted?

The good news is that between our current reality and where we want to be lies the opportunity to transform our lives. How I hear you ask? Where can one go to find serenity? Well one thing’s for certain it’s not a commodity, readily available for purchase via the internet. A retreat maybe away from people; away from noise; work; the family; or the phone? No – there is no quick-fix blue-cross sale to deal with this.

You’ll find my 10 tips for finding serenity below:

1. Breathe, breathe and breathe again.  Practice slowing your breathing down and shifting the focus so that your breath moves lower in your body.  Become conscious of the rhythm of your breath.  Do not force yourself to move to someone else’s rhythm instead concentrate on just letting the breath move gently in and out your body.
2. Let go of things which you cannot change i.e. the past.  Instead focus on the learning each significant event in your life has given you to this point.
3. Accept you are human and fallible, it’s what makes you who you are.  No-one said we had to be perfect.
4. Learn to take pleasure in little things, appreciate the beauty that is both in and around you.
5. Engage in activities that will feed your mind, body and spirit, 15-30 minutes every day.
6. Avoid other people’s drama, choose to practice a healthy sense of detachment.  Detachment doesn’t mean you don’t care.  Instead encourage others to take personal responsibility for themselves.
7. Make conscious choices, letting go of guilt and learning to say no on occasion will help.
8. Choose food and fluids that nourish you and lighten the digestive load.  Take time to chew and eat and savour your food.
9. Build friendship networks that support rather than drain you.
10. Spend time alone and in appreciation for all the gifts the universe has sent to you.

At the end of the day though I do believe the answer lies within us.  We are the experts on our own happiness, the authors of our own story.

So we can also become the masters of our own serenity – for it is no more than whatever one needs to do to restore inner calm and equilibrium, after all our bodies are naturally geared for adaptation.

I am absolutely clear though that what works for one will almost certainly not work for someone else.